A day in the office with full of thoughts going on

time seems to be passing by without any meaning. the week is almost gone in a flash and weekend is here again, before you know what is really going on the new week is starting and the whole cycle and motion moves again. life seems meaningless when you step into working life and even when you are doing things that you love in your job/career, there will be a point in time where you just feel like it's for the sake of going through the motion and earning your livelihood. Is it juz me feeling that or is there someone out there who feels the same? I am sure life is more interesting than this and work is not just work, it has to be something more. anyway, i felt antisocial. maybe it's abt saving money or maybe it's abt sick of outside food, or maybe i am just antisocial.

I have been packing lunches to work for the past 3 - 4 weeks, reason given to myself is "I am scared of outside food, expensive and full of msg and not healthy." So got mom to prepare lunchbox for me at least 3 days out of the 5 working days. Part of me felt that i also need to save more money, but the other part of me is really not able to relate to what my other colleagues talked abt during lunch. topics like kids growing up, families or sometimes work related "talks". I juz dun seem to understand or relate to them yet. they have been in the coy for at least 7yrs and they know every single change and people. for me, onli been here for 5mths but yet still so foreign to the people working here and the different organisations/dept that exist. So ignorant!

Today me felt bored, not becoz i have nothing to do (but really i have been trying to look biz) but becoz my lovely colleague cum lunchtime sharing buddy is no longer here. She has chosen to go for greener pasture in downtown Shenton Way. I wonder what more "excuses" can i give in the remaining 6 weeks that i am gg to be working here to avoid gg lunch with the rest. (juz rejected e offer to lunch with the rest, giving e excuse that my breakky has not yet digested. ha! what a silly way!) i feel lazy to move my bum during lunch. and i know this can't go on if they are eventually gg to convert me to perm or even extend my contract for only God knows how long. I need a change of mindset towards the pple here i guess. God pls help!

I am so looking forward to my half day off coming Monday. I needed a little break to get away from this cold big office and also to rest for preparation of a longer and busier week ahead. finally finished doing my beloved birthday present, gave him lots of hints yesterday night but think he couldn't imagine e kind of bday he's gg to have this year. full of surprises, i hope he feels and views it this way. cross my fingers and wish that it will be a wonderful day for us. after the birthday, what's next?! counting down to the next "celebration" --- our anniversary. Ha! birthday not even over and now racking my brains for ideas for the next one. You probably guess it right! I have nothing better to do to keep my little brain busy.

Gonna stop writing now as dede gonna call me in 10mins time. =)